Dharun Ravi and Molly Wei are not the only people responsible for the death of Tyler Clementi. There is of course Tyler himself, but also society at large. What kind of society do we live in where the shame of being “outed” is so traumatic that it would drive someone to kill themselves?
Dharun’s filming and posting of his roommates sexual encounter was juvenile, invasive and to say the least, cruel. But it would hardly be the first time roommates did awful things like this to each other, and most people survive bullies. What made this event so awful is that at a time when Tyler Clementi should have free to discover who he is, gay or not, that opportunity was stolen from him because he was vulnerable.
Now Dharun and Molly will have to live the rest of their lives knowing their cruelty contributed to driving a person to kill themselves; and for what? Because he was “making out with a dude”? I find it shocking that at a university, which should a place of progression and learning, anyone could be so narrow minded that seeing two guys kiss would cause so much interest.
When will a gay kiss become “just a kiss”, or gay sex become “just sex”?
On the day that happens then there won’t be any more Tyler Clementi’s. No more gay kids will be hurt by outings, or by coming out of their own accord. No one will be able to leverage sexual orientation for bullying or segregation. No one will need to spend their lives in the closet fearing what others will think.
I am sorry you couldn’t wait for that day Tyler, I really am. Those who love you will love you anyway and those who don’t, didn’t really love you in the first place.